LSpace Strikes Back
by Phorcys
Summary: Discworld Crossover. In the deepest, darkest corners or Yuuko's store room something stirs. 'glingeglingeglinge'


**L-Space Strikes Back**

Disclaimer: Not mine, not ever, not even if I wish really hard and click my heels together three times.

The shelves of Yuuko's store room spread out in towering rows. As far as he could see Watanuki could find dust and grime on every surface. The first time he had tied his apron on and set off to clean Yukko's hoard he had, had to pause. For the room which sat between the kitchen and down stairs bathroom was only 3 meters across, but inside through the sliding door the room more reaseambled a low ceiling air craft hanger who's and shelves filled the strange space from unseen end to unseen end.

It did not take him long to stop paying attention to the peculiar nature of the store, after the peculiar nature of working for Yuuko had begun to wear off. But every Wednesday afternoon he was again reminded as he had set this time aside to clean the store room.

Each week he would pull out all the carpets, kimonos and other cloth items to be washed and beaten. He would take all the silver, wood, pewter and gold to be polished. Finally he would dust, during his week absence a two inch thick layer would settle on the shelves. He would raise clouds of dust in his frantic cleaning, till the wood shone and the treasures gleamed.

So when Wednesday would come around again he was always surprised to find the dust was once again thick on the ground, and on the shelves and on the porcelain and strange mystic figures that made his head hurt if he looked at them too long. The idols, vases, wands and magical devices of unknown origin.

So one Wednesday he put down his bottle of wood polish for the last time and unwrapped the cloth he kept around his mouth, to protect him from the dust and other strange powers that were left to drift by Yuuko in her store room.

Only a few weeks ago he had been left staring at purple elves who wanted to eat his toes for three hours, which Yuuko swore really didn't exist. Because he had taken a deep breath of some strange glowing green powder left on a high shelf. So he made sure he was more careful from then on.

Tonight as he screwed the polish bottles lid on tight he though he heard something off in the distant shelves '**glingleglingleglingle**', it sounded like some sad little bells.

It wasn't the first time he had heard this noise and others like it from the deeper corners of the store room, but he had also learnt to ignore them, the smell of cooked cabbage that some times lingered, and the banana skins that littered the floor in the deeper darker corners of the store room.

Turning to leave he heard it again. '**glingleglingleglingl**e', and jerked his head back to face the room, only to discover a fine film of dust covering everything he had previously scrubbed swept, moped polished and buffed.

A small shape scurried across the floorboards in front of him, acting before he could think he slammed a foot down catching it underneath his heel. He crouched down and discovered a diminutive man. His face a mass of wrinkles it looked like a half eaten apple left in the sun for a week. Held in it's hands were tiny bells and on it's back was a silky grey sack.

It was working furiously to get out from Watanuki's heel, when he noticed the boy peering down at him and stopped. He stopped struggling and grinned, well he showed all his teeth it might have been called a grin. "'allo Guv." It's voice was high and sounded as though it were speaking from underneath an empty tin bath.

"What are you doing, Yuuko will not go lightly if you mean to steal from her."

"Yuuko who? Nah, I ain't come to steal. I sort of come to do the opposite if you know what I mean."

"You mean you've come to leave something." Watanuki carefully picked the creature up by the back of it's greasy green cardigan. Gingerly in fear of being bitten, the creature looked like it would bite. It would probably give him scabies as well.

"You could say that, much better than my last job." The little man made tiny ringing noises overtime he moved.

"Which was?" Watanuki placed it on a shelf at eye level, keeping a firm hold.

"Well, ya' know that noise when ever magic happens." The boy had to think about this for a moment, he had heard many things just before magic, either performed by Yuuko in her theatrical style or some other force.

"What I usually hear when something involving magic occurs is 'Arrgghh, oh gods, oh gods, why does this always happen to me Why are the purple elves eating my toes?'"

"Well trans-dimensional physical personification is a difficult thing, just take it from me that when magic was around I was the one with the little bells." It shook the bells, they went '**glingleglingleglingle**'. "It's not easy for too find a new job when your over 600 and have a tiny family to feed."

"So what's in the sack." Watanuki moved to pick it up.

"I wouldn't do that Guv."

"Why not? It's just a tiny little bag, what can it do?" The little man grasped the bag tightly to it's chest.

"You just don't trust me on this. I only open it a smidgen and it makes this entire room fill with dust."

A look of dawning understanding then rage appeared on Watanuki's face. "It's you. You're the one who's been spreading dust every where. As soon as I turn my back it shows up. I knew I wasn't imagining it. Do you know how much time I spend cleaning this room every week"

With a cry of rage Watanuki went to strangle the gnome and missed. With a cry it slipped from his grasp and ran faster than the boy could follow along the shelf. Hiding safely behind a cursed Russian doll, and a possessed puppet. Stomping around the store room Watanuki swore to himself as each time he looked away the shelves gathered dust. It just wasn't fair

'**glingleglingleglingle**'

A/N

I had this stuck in my head since I re-read Hogfather. For everyone who has not read Terry Pratchett's Discworld series I highly recommend you do.


End file.
